Saturday, October 28, 2006

Hertzan Chimera lives!

this is the news you've all been waiting for - two new Hertzan Chimera novels!

This Halloween, in a scene reminiscent of Robert Powell's ZeffirelliChrist, I shall resurrect the old hater of mediocrity. These two never-before-seen Hertzan Chimera books TWILIGHT'S LAST GLEAMING and THE HOO-HOO ARE COMING will be available by the end of this weekend, be there lightning in the sky and spirit in the heart of men. Click the book covers to BUY NOW, dear fanatics, follow the link...

Friday, October 27, 2006

Chimeraworld and the anti-mediocrity league:

...this was gonna be another ludicrous rant about my continued war against mediocrity in the genre writing market - there truly are some real mediocre talents out there peddling their trade, having their books published and getting on with satisfying the customer. Hey, if that's what the customer wants, then he's right, right?

After my return from my recent holiday in sunny southern Spain I'd resolved to start the ANTI-MEDIOCRITY LEAGUE -- the idea being that I'd gather around me writers with guts, writers with attitude, and above all writers with talent and we'd CRUSH all those mediocre fucks and sloppy genre hacks into the dust with our collective boot heel.

But, you know what? I had an ever more transparent anti-mediocrity yardstick whacking me across the hairy, white ass. The CHIMERAWORLD anthology (which I edit and publish through Chimericana Books) now in its fourth year ('all cars must die' is this year's theme). Here's a list of the writers whose works have been featured in these first four issues of Chimerworld:

C.C. Parker, W. Bill Czolgosz, Greg Beatty, John Peters, L. Marie Wood, Latricia L. Lane, T.M. Gray, Ken Goldman, Queenie Tirone, Jaime L. Burvato, Alex Severin, William S. Brock, polycarp kusch, Joseph Miles, Kevin Anderson, J. M. Heluk, Isaac Fellows, Kevin L. Donihe, Tony Richards, S.J. Hinton, Steve Short, John Edward Lawson, Rickey Windell George, Steve Lockley & Paul Lewis, Brian W Keen, Kurt Newton, Dustin LaValley, Derek Gunn, Michele Acker, Anthony Cain, William D. Carl, Glen Alan Hamilton, Quentin S Crisp, J. M. Heluk, Charles Richard Laing, Nicholas Alan Tillemans, Suzanne Church, Eric Shapiro, Karen James, John Meany, Andrew Zimmerman Jones, Richard Lee, Destiny West, Ralph Greco, Jr., Dean R Winters, Michael De Kler, Jenny Ashford, Nicholas Alan Tillemans, Joshua Scribner, Sean Logan, Chet Gottfried, Paul Pinn, D.L. Snell, Anthony Armstrong, C.L. Russo, Will McIntosh, Tim McDaniel, Michael A. Kechula, Kevin James Miller, Richard Pitaniello, Richard D. Moore, Liam Davies, Tonya Price, Glen Alan Hamilton, David L Tamarin, Mark Zirbel, Christina Kinnan, Paul Murray Collrin, Jenny Ashford, Liam Davies, Courtney Burback, Mark Robyn, M.P. Johnson, Tyler Runde, J. M. Heluk, Kelly Stevens, Ray Wallace, Gerard Brennan, Brad C. Hodson, M. Jones, Suzanne Burns, Jeff Drake, Cameron Pierce, Sean Rickards, David Mitchell Turnbull, Kek-W.

I suddenly realised that if you ain't in this list, you is a mediocre writer. Simple as that.


Friday, October 20, 2006

the David Lynch of horror - nice:

It was with great joy that I discovered this brand new review of my novel Jane's Game from Nickolas Cook on the respected horror-reporting website Hellnotes.

Hellnotes review of Jane's Game (novel).

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Chimeraworld @ MySpace

just a quick note to let you know that there's a new MySpace page dedicated to all things Chimeraworld. The aim of this MySpace page is to keep past, present and future Chimeraworld writers (and readers) updated on the progress of the current issue and details of future issues/events, press releases, samples, guidelines, all'a that... -- Friends welcome.

Chimeraworld 4 - TABLE OF CONTENTS

This morning, I finalised the running order of the twenty-three stories that will be in Chimeraworld 4 (all cars must die) to be released through Chimericana Books in November/December 2006.

cover image supplied by Ryan Hoover - a Japan-based photographer


THE MOTOR BOYS - Mark Zirbel 5
THE SEAT - Christina Kinnan 12
BROKEN - Paul Murray Collrin 19
PAINTED WINDOWS - Jenny Ashford 23
I LOVE MY CAR - Liam Davies 29
CAR LOVER - Courtney Burback 34
LENNY - Mark Robyn 42
TINGLES – M.P. Johnson 52
BETTY ACID - Tyler Runde 57
DRIVING HER HOME - Kelly Stevens 72
ROAD RAGE - Gerard Brennan 96
405 - Brad C. Hodson 101
GO! GO! GO! - M. Jones 109
THE ONE FATE DARED - Suzanne Burns 116
THE LOST HIGHWAY - David Mitchell Turnbull 141
BIOS: 164

Congratulations to the finalists of this year's Chimeraworld selection process - these are 23 of the sickest, weirdest, strangest, most exhilarating stories I've ever had the privilege to receive. As you'll see there are a lot of English writers in this year's anthology and a lot of female writers, which gladdens my wretched heart.

Good luck to all and let's spread the news about this great book so that (by the time the Xmas drink-drive stat-spike is reaching its zenith) there'll be no turning back from a brighter future.

Full guidelines for Chimeraworld 5 go up in early 2007 with a tentative theme of "Emoticons" and I'd be delighted to receive submissions from all previous submitees to this anthology in the four years it's been running.

Friday, October 13, 2006

what writer are you supposed to be

I don't normally do these sorta little shitty online quentionnaires but...

You Should Be a Science Fiction Writer

Your ideas are very strange, and people often wonder what planet you're from.
And while you may have some problems being "normal," you'll have no problems writing sci-fi.
Whether it's epic films, important novels, or vivid comics...
Your own little universe could leave an important mark on the world!

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Radiohead - THE BEST OF...

So, I've listened to a LOT of Radiohead and wondered if there was a BEST OF... compilation of Radiohead's greatest hits. I walked into my local HMV here in Oxford and asked the assistant who checked up for me. Nope, no Best Of... on her files.

Right then.

If your humble blogger were to compile a BEST OF RADIOHEAD it would contain (in no specific order):

Fake Plastic Trees
Pulk/Pull - Revolving Doors
You and Whose Army
Dollars & Cents
Life in a Glasshouse
Sail To the Moon
How to Disappear Completely
Paranoid Android
Fitter, Happier
No Surprises
Street Spirit

I'd buy that for $10.00

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

ARIZONA BAY - Bill Hicks (comment):

on the subject of Bill Hicks' "Arizona Bay" THE BIG ONE remark "when L.A. falls into the fucking ocean and is flushed away all it will leave is Arizona Bay."

erm, but I'm not sure it will. As it's only a plate-techtonic N/S shearing action, the very worst that will happen is a new Los Angeles-length island will wander down Mexico way - we could think of funny names for it, like Is-la-la-land (or something that's actually funny might be better).

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Year's Best Fantasy and Horror - honorable mentions:

Four stories from Chimeraworld 2 have been awarded Honorable Mentions (US spelling) in 2006's Year's Best Fantasy and Horror, a yearly compendium of the best in fantastic fiction edited by Ellen Datlow, Kelly Link and Gavin J. Grant.

The four stories Honored are:
Steve Lockley and Paul Lewis's DAMP
Quentin S Crisp's ASKING FOR IT
William D Carl's CUNT

As Dustin kindly Comment'd on my MySpace page about his Honorable Mention, "Mike, I'd like to thank you for accepting such an extreme tale, without you, there would be no honorable mention for I." and you know he's absolutely right about pushing the boundaries of the acceptable and striving to produce something more than just the generic and the mediocre, history will remember our efforts and honour our strife.


Saturday, October 07, 2006

Chainsaw magazine implodes - the lost interview.

Chainsaw Magazine (and editor Patrick Winston) has disappeared off the face of the earth ... here's an interview I did for their special 'bizarro' issue 3 (I even did the cover for it), interviewer Kyle Kucek. In light of recent events (where the bizarros finally got rid of yours truly) it's vaguely prophetic - enjoy tha rant.

Chainsaw Magazine - issue 3 (defunkt)
interview by Kyle Kucek

Kyke Kucek: So who exactly are you, for those of us who don't know?

Mike Philbin: I'm an artist/writer from England; that's in Europe, close to London. My major artistic focus is subversive creative _expression that explores the difference between perceived reality and pre-ordained social morés. Mine is a battle with 'normality', 'marketability' and 'mediocrity', which I have vowed to eradicate via my creative output. Being this much of a prick is a serious business but one that I think is worth pursuing, as a legacy. I don't think you can be a worthy creative talent and hope to sell paintings for millions or sell millions of books – the best one can hope for is a hatred by the masses, revulsion among ones peers. I aim to be one of those artists who are reviled and denounced by contemporary society so that a later generation can re-evaluate their error – that is my aim, to be discovered after my death.

KK: Now, bizarro is definitely a genre many people aren't familiar with. Four words or phrases that you think describe it?

MP: Who. Gives. A. Fuck. The bizarro manifesto states that, "Bizarro isn't really a new genre. Just a new term. For decades, people have been going into bookstores and video stores looking for the weird stuff. To them, "weird stuff" is a genre, just like horror or science fiction. But it has never been given an official name before. Until now." but to me it's more about placing mind bombs inside the readers' heads until they explode. I want my readers tortured to death by my books. I want my readers to immolate and leave only a pile of despondent ash where their armchairs used to be. If I hear of one of my readers dying with a copy of my book in their hands I will ejaculate spontaneously. You'll be cleaning my shit off the ceiling, baby.

KK: In late 2005, you started Chimericana Books to publish some of your own projects. What made you decide to start such a risky venture?

MP: At the time I was being published by Cyber Pulp of Houston, TX and when they folded I got the rights back to the Chimeraworld anthologies which I had edited. There had been two published by then and I had Chimeraworld #3 all ready to go. So, I thought, I'll start my own print-on-demand company Chimericana Books to continue the Chimeraworld franchise – it wasn't really about self publishing, it was more about offering the reader an alternative to the dull, grey horror product. There was no financial risk involved the way I did it. And I could print out books that contained the sort of stories and the sort of themes that I enjoy reading. I'm a very hands-on editor and I'll suggest sweeping changes to stories to help them fit with the themes rather than coldly reject a promising story that needs a helping hand. I decided to re-release books such as HIM+CHIM+HER (collaborative stories I did with 16 male and female writers), the BEST OF HORROR QUARTERLY (first three issues of the now defunct website) and THE LIFE AND DEATH OF HERTZAN CHIMERA (the official biography of an invented writing persona).

KK: Tell us a bit about Hertzan Chimera, your writing persona. Since his "death", do you think people's reactions have changed toward you?

MP: Well, as far as I can gauge, my "Hertzan Chimera" writing and online persona wound up a lot of my peers. For some the wounds have not yet healed. For others the scars are still visible despite the forgiveness. I've never been a people person and I suppose I came across as a real cunt. I'm the sorta guy who'll call a spade a spade. I'm the sort of guy who doesn't suffer fools gladly. Maybe I've just mellowed a bit since I first unleashed the Hertzan Chimera Unit on an unsuspecting genre. People did expect me to just be somebody totally different having gotten the Hertzan monkey off my back but that's not how it works. Hertzan Chimera was always a strong part of the real me and I can sense his persona peeking out every now and then to wreak his havoc once more.

KK: Would you say your work is well-accepted in the UK, your current residence?

MP: Apart from one or two 'anorak's in the horror/sci-fi industry on this side of the Atlantic, I am mostly unknown in the UK. Most of my stories and all of my books have been published in America/Canada and that gives me review problems as no English journal will review one of my, technically, import book. Oh, the irony. I remember going to a British Fantasy Society meeting and one fan turns up to eagerly shake my hand and as soon as I opened my mouth he goes, "But you're not American?" I wonder whatever gave him that idea?

KK: What do you think the best way that we, the people, can promote bizarro?

MP: The best way to promote bizarro is to assassinate all those bizarro writers. That's the only way to secure a future for that bunch of amoral reprobates. Most of their stuff isn't even funny. It's a polluting dribble of cumm pouring from the end of a shrivelled cock or a bitten clitoris that needs dousing in petrol and setting light to. That or the bizarro-ite should be strung up in the centre of town while small children flay the worthless flesh from their grease-dripping bones. That would be a fitting ad campaign for Bizarros.

KK: Where do you hope bizarro will go in the (possibly near) future?

MP: That's a hard one. The central premise of the Bizarro Movement seems to be tacit inactivity, aka inertia, at best their manifesto encourages organic infestation of the mainstream via the ultimate clique of 'word of mouth'. One or two of the bizarro writers are actively out there trying to make people understand why they're a part of this wild, mad rodeo of hope but it's hindered by having no core philosophy like Islam or Christianity, it's neither militant nor mainstream enough just yet. It needs one of those bizarros to go and set up his own death cult and fuck-to-death a million daughters or even better run for senator of some southern cock-roach infested State and make a constitutional amendment that makes bizarro mandatory. If I lived in the States, I guess I'd be obliged to hang out in bizarro bars a lot and have loads of flings on the side with all those fucked up individuals male or female. That'd be the expected lifestyle for one known as a bizarro, right? The fact that most of us are public non-entities who'd freeze up like a deer in the headlights if we ever got any fame, or fortune. Heaven forefend.

KK: Anything else we should know?

MP: Ice cream and apple pie – that's all one needs to know.